bmwracer wrote:

Until now, unfortunately.

Ah yes.

This thread is a compilation of 3 or 4 different ones, but all with the same or similar content.
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Well she's not Japanese but man, I went over to my Aunt's friend's house and her older daughter came in, and had her friend with her as well..

Good God....

And not only that I sat across from her friend, lol me being shy made it hard to just share at her, did not want to be rude.

She's just a quiet as me, lol I think they went clubbing or something, I dunno how old she was but she knows my age now.

lol My name for the night was "hun" & "babe"

Oh and when came time for me to leave, I left with them, LOL her dauther said "look at him he's blushing" lol my cheeks felt like they were going to pop, uber cuteness.

LOL I'm so tired.. I just got home at 12AM got stopped by New York MTA policde because I ran a stop sign because I was looking at my gps map, later to have the cop just say to be careful and not to focus on that so much. And now I have to have this CM ready for this morning at 9AM..

Looks like I wont be getting any sleep tonight/morning, So if I sound like I'm snapping at someone i don't mean it, i'm so drained out.

SubaruWRX wrote:

Looks like I wont be getting any sleep tonight/morning, So if I sound like I'm snapping at someone i don't mean it, i'm so drained out.

Happens to the best of us.


Good luck with your CM
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SubaruWRX wrote:

lol My name for the night was "hun" & "babe" .

so u were confused between


next time just keep it simple

lol well I finally finished, I'm so tired.

SubaruWRX wrote:

lol well I finally finished, I'm so tired.

Finished ... tired ... Ahem ahem !! ... u r refering to finishing your CM right

SubaruWRX wrote:

My mom had a little issue with it.. but I drove my mom nuts... All the way from Connecticut to Quebec Canada, I had nothing but J-pop in the Subaru Now she is saying "I don't mind you dating or marrying a Japanese girl" "Just as long as she's Christian" lol you know how screwed up that is.. Thats just stupid...

Ouch. That kind of narrows down the playong field. I think about 2% of Japanese are Christian then you factor out the men, married women and those that have too much of an age gap for you and you have a big challenge.
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From the Simpsons
Mr. Burns: I could crush him like an ant. But it would be too easy. No, revenge is a dish best served cold. I'll bide my time until ... Oh, what the hell. I'll just crush him like an ant.

Doramafan113 wrote:

Ouch. That kind of narrows down the playong field. I think about 2% of Japanese are Christian then you factor out the men, married women and those that have too much of an age gap for you and you have a big challenge.

Try heading to the southern end of the Japan (around the Nagasaki region). There's probably more Christians down there than elsewhere in the country.

First of all I did search around a bit to look for a similar thread and came up empty, I understand this forum is high traffic so I hope this thread is at least reasonably uncommon.

I'm currently visiting japan but I am not too familiar with the dating culture over here. Though I won't be here too much longer (~8 days), I am nonetheless curious and interested in meeting some japanese girls. Rather than actually go out and take action, I decided to hide behind my internet connection and just talk about it for now (my excuses to delay action)

So, what is a respectable way for one guy to approach one or more seemingly single and pretty young girls in japan? I can speak japanese fluently so that is not the problem. I don't want to seem like the "hey baby its my birthday" approach but at the same time isn't this considered as "nanpa" in japan. I am well aware of things like "goukon" (a gathering of several equal number of guys and girls in hopes of meeting someone special) but I do not know even one person in my city my age nor do I know how to get in contact with such an arrangement. Besides, I'd rather just go to a public location where young girls might frequent and have a little variety to work with

*paragraph heavily edited* I am mixed japanese/white myself...How does being foreign (in particular white or mixed "haafu") or being really tall (in japan 183cm is pretty tall in my observations) affect initial impressions? I have been told speaking english is "kakko ii" (cool/admirable?) as well.

Anyway I would be interested to discuss about what is different and fun or interesting about dating in japan. What japanese ppl look for in a partner and how it differs from dating in say, america. Approaching techniques and such being only one example.

Just to start some of the discussion myself, it is my impression in japan that girls are slightly more outgoing in expressing their interest in men than they would be in america (almost never, just hint and wait). Do you think this is true? The only reason I say this is because in dramas and such, I notice japanese girls tend to confess (kokuhaku) way more than in american equilavents, but then again I don't watch much american tv...anyway I'm just curious.

And finally, I edited this post several times so that I hopefully don't hit any nerves with stereotypes and such, it is not my intention.

-Ken

**Attempted edit for clarity and neutrality

Thank you very much for doing a search before posting this topic. Many don't even put forth such effort.

Instead of worrying too much about approach and technique, don't you think it'd be better to just be yourself and just do it? It's not that hard. Especially since you're not Japanese (native). If you were a Japanese, I'd believe they would already have some sort of stereotype-expectation for your approach. That's what makes it so much easier for "gaijins" to pick up J-girls.
Use whatever you were born with for your advantage. Uniqueness (not the dorkiness type) is what makes "nanpa" so much fun. Just have fun with it and don't be discouraged if you get shut down the first time. You aren't going to get a hole in one all the time.
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ahochaude wrote:

Thank you very much for doing a search before posting this topic. Many don't even put forth such effort.

You ain't kidding, Aho. Props Gxcad, for the effort.

Quote:

You aren't going to get a hole in one all the time.

Hmm, interesting choices of words.

ahochaude wrote:

You aren't going to get a hole in one all the time.

YEAH i was also like ..... Aha now what do u REALLY mean!

I just finished reading your initial post, a new thread that i have not seen before. I often wonder the same things about j-girls and dating. I too am a Gajin, but often wonder how the dating scene would be there if i were to live in japan. How do they react to another asian-gajin. I think the j-girls may seem more receptive to white gajin, or half/half gajin, i may somewhat blend it, sorta, but what is considered tall, i think i am about avg for a guy, maybe tall for an asian. But I noticed in your post that you say you are fluent, a definite advantage for you. I need to learn the language more. How long did you say you were going to stay there in Japan? I suppose you can meet j-girls everywhere in japan, depends what type of j-girl you are interested in, Roponggi girls, i hear that they maybe more open to Gajin there, but are probably more wild type girls there. I am not sure, but I'd say you have a good to decent change of meeting some nice j-girls, take a chance. Good Luck.

ahochaude wrote:

You aren't going to get a hole in one all the time.

bmwracer wrote:

Hmm, interesting choices of words.

z123_us wrote:

YEAH i was also like ..... Aha now what do u REALLY mean!

Whew, I'm glad I wasn't the only one. I guess I'm part of the "mind in gutter" club.

ahochaude wrote:

You aren't going to get a hole in one all the time.

Heh, just so happens I played ground golf today! *looks around...* WHAT?

"just do it" heh, maybe I will, but its always easier said than done...and I am replying to "just try the nanpa" for those gutter minded folks lol I am so innocent .

I am mostly interested in normal japanese girls, tame if anything is probably my preference. Living in san francisco and having a strong preference to asian girls leaves you mostly with chinese korean or japanese girls, and I have not yet had the opportunity to meet a lot of korean or japanese girls, which being japanese, I am particularly interested in dating japanese girls (japan raised even more so).

My friend was just in japan (but not with me) and just got back to america a few days ago and we have been chatting on aim and he told me how he was able to meet his friends penpal in japan, and through her found another japanese girl (fairly pretty from the pics) to spend an entire day in tokyo with...sounds like a plan for next time hehe. Also, although he doesn't know lots of japanese (I think he has been taking japanese classes at college for about 4 years now...so its not bad either) he said most ppl were very patient and very willing to chat it up with him, as you can imagine those 2 girls were not very fluent in english either but were willing to spend an entire day with him around tokyo.

I guess the Penpal trick might be a good way to get around the initial wall of trust that would probably help nanpa (hitting on stranger girls on the street) success.

-Ken

All this twisting of my "hole in one" comment....

What do you guys think I am? A Pervert??!!!


Uh, well yes, I am!
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I don't know about girls out here being more open to admitting their adoration for you... If you know them somewhat,, they'll be more comfortable hanging around with you... even if you're just a penpal. There's tons of male/female buddy duos/trios... so, which is often different from how it is in the states.

As far as what type of Gaijin they like... it varies... women just like what they like... Being white, black, etc isn't going to help you out too much (unless you go to areas where they're searching for white or black guys)... and being asian isn't going to hurt you, either.

Sometimes, I just wonder, because... I see some of the most homliest men with some of the most beautiful women... and it just perplexes me, as they can't really communicate well due to the langauge barrier... so, what's the deal? I guess it's just "novelty".

Just be yourself, and chat up a young lady... Don't shoot in with the intention of getting a girlfriend, just chat her up as you would a normal woman... Don't offer to buy her a drink right off the bat, because you won't know how she'll react... and the reciprocity thing that Japan keens itself on also throws a wrench into the matter.

Just talk... get to know a little about each other... then you can offer to buy her a drink. If you're charming enough, coupled with some good looks (height won't do much, as there are plenty of tall Japanese men and women nowadays)... you should be able to hit it off... Hell, you just have to possess one little trait that she finds cute or attractive, and you won't scare her away...

People are nice, for the most part... although you have to be prepared to be shot down, as sometimes their male or female friends are protective and will try to pull them away from you, so don't come off too strong.

Basically, just be "you", as everyone said, and just try to make friends. Things usually work well from there.

Ooooh well said hikki!!!! My sentiments exactly. Just be yourself and start off with being friends.

i think Gaijins and half Gaijin half asians are more easily accepted in the cities than in the country sides. that has been the case every time i've traveled.

i've always wondered this as well.