Question: How long should a couple be together before engaging in anything sexual?
I know the answer is "when the time is right", but I mean, specifically from a guy's perspective, when would a guy think it should happen?
If it happens too quickly, the girl will be labelled a slut. If it happens too slow, the girl would be considered the neighbors grandma. Where's the mid-ground?
if it's gonna be something serious, let's say... 3 months?
but it's a totally different thing if he's toootally hot. like steamy hot.
but what do i know. i've only had one real girlfriend, two heart-brakes, and now i'm bi-curious _________________
Joined: 19 Jun 2006 Posts: 11363 Location: �I�[�X�g�����A Country:
Posted: Tue Jun 17, 2008 9:21 am Post subject:
Wynter wrote:
Hmm. Like what?
Well, like age of the guy, previous relationship history/experience, how much he likes the girl in question (as in enough for a "permanent" relationship), cultural differences, religious/moral differences....
if it's gonna be something serious, let's say... 3 months?
Hmmm... that's what coco-chan said as well. So 3 months.
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but it's a totally different thing if he's toootally hot. like steamy hot.
but what do i know. i've only had one real girlfriend, two heart-brakes, and now i'm bi-curious
Awwww! What you need is your first relationship with a guy. That'll satisfy your curiosity and perhaps make things more "clear" for you.
Anime Dad wrote:
Well, like age of the guy.
Wow, I must be totally oblivious. Why does the age of the guy matter when it comes to sex? Unless he's a minor, of course.
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previous relationship history/experience
Secure and tested.
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how much he likes the girl in question (as in enough for a "permanent" relationship)
Good question...
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cultural differences, religious/moral differences....
But this would only matter if one is not in agreement, right? I don't think the situation will be forced... both would HAVE to be in agreement. _________________
Joined: 24 Mar 2008 Posts: 1969 Location: Newbury Park, CA Country:
Posted: Tue Jun 17, 2008 9:42 am Post subject:
Wynter wrote:
Question: How long should a couple be together before engaging in anything sexual?
I know the answer is "when the time is right", but I mean, specifically from a guy's perspective, when would a guy think it should happen?
If it happens too quickly, the girl will be labelled a slut. If it happens too slow, the girl would be considered the neighbors grandma. Where's the mid-ground?
I think you should have a basis for your physical relationship first. Make sure you have some familiarity. If that feels like it's the first night, so be it... if it feels like 3 weeks, fine.
As for me, it's been highly variable. I've had sex with a long term girlfriend (nearly 2 years) after having only known her 4 hours and I've not had anything happen for 4 weeks with a short term fling (just about killed the poor girl, I'm afraid.. she should have said something!) - actually it's better than that - I didn't even kiss her for like 3 weeks. _________________
"Actually, I don't have bones. I'm supported
by a system of fluid-filled bladders"
Last edited by phlargo on Tue Jun 17, 2008 9:45 am; edited 2 times in total
Was that a general question or was there some personal interest involved? (Oops, should I delete this question?)
Anime Dad wrote:
Well, an older/more experienced guy could possibly not rush into anything without being sure whereas a younger guy may not be so patient.
You wanted opinions, right?
LOL! No! I wanted advice.
phlargo wrote:
I think you should have a basis for your physical relationship first. Make sure you have some familiarity. If that feels like it's the first night, so be it... if it feels like 3 weeks, fine.
As for me, it's been highly variable. I've had sex with a long term girlfriend (nearly 2 years) after having only known her 4 hours and I've not had anything happen for 4 weeks with a short term fling (just about killed the poor girl, I'm afraid.. she should have said something!)
So it all comes back to whatever feels right, eh? I guess my question stems from "where does it all start?" If the guy doesn't initiate, should the girl? Or vice versa? I guess we should all just leave it up to time.
cori wrote:
Now that you put it that way, I hope I can find some younger guy instead of an older one.
LOL! Yer awesome. I'll stick with the older guys. I'm such a prune. _________________
Joined: 19 Jun 2006 Posts: 11363 Location: �I�[�X�g�����A Country:
Posted: Tue Jun 17, 2008 9:50 am Post subject:
Wynter wrote:
LOL! Yer awesome. I'll stick with the older guys. I'm such a prune.
nothing wrong with them
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LOL! No! I wanted advice.
That's what I meant
I'm probably the wrong person to offer advice on the subject anyway, being married for 22 years to my first love But you'll probably get a few different bits of advice from different people....
Joined: 24 Mar 2008 Posts: 1969 Location: Newbury Park, CA Country:
Posted: Tue Jun 17, 2008 9:50 am Post subject:
Wynter wrote:
LOL! Yer awesome. I'll stick with the older guys. I'm such a prune.
I think a girl should feel free to initiate things. If the guy isn't comfortable, he'll make that clear... just as a girl should do the same. _________________
"Actually, I don't have bones. I'm supported
by a system of fluid-filled bladders"
Joined: 31 Mar 2007 Posts: 3930 Location: �p���_�N�ƔL�B Country:
Posted: Tue Jun 17, 2008 9:51 am Post subject:
Wynter wrote:
So it all comes back to whatever feels right, eh? I guess my question stems from "where does it all start?" If the guy doesn't initiate, should the girl? Or vice versa? I guess we should all just leave it up to time.
Despite what I've been saying, I'm pretty old fashioned, so I usually let the guy make the first move, whether it's a kiss or something more. Only in the initial phases though.
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LOL! Yer awesome. I'll stick with the older guys. I'm such a prune.
I like older guys too, but maybe I need someone young to make it a bit more spicy. _________________
I'm probably the wrong person to offer advice on the subject anyway, being married for 22 years to my first love But you'll probably get a few different bits of advice from different people....
No worries! It was a "general" question on my part.
phlargo wrote:
I think a girl should feel free to initiate things. If the guy isn't comfortable, he'll make that clear... just as a girl should do the same.
Sold! I think that's the confirmation I was looking for.
cori wrote:
I like older guys too, but maybe I need someone young to make it a bit more spicy.
But older guys have experience. I think that alone can add a wonder of spice. I'd rather not go through the guessing game again. _________________
Joined: 31 Mar 2007 Posts: 3930 Location: �p���_�N�ƔL�B Country:
Posted: Tue Jun 17, 2008 10:00 am Post subject:
monta wrote:
any of your neighbour's son hot and needs money? pay him to do the lawn
Haha, that would be great, but I think that would be illegal. Maybe I should hang around the college campus instead.
Wynter wrote:
But older guys have experience. I think that alone can add a wonder of spice. I'd rather not go through the guessing game again.
How many years older? And I guess you're right about younger guys not having that much experience, but still, you and I have more than 5 years difference in age, so my idea of someone "younger" could be your idea of "older." _________________
Joined: 19 Jun 2006 Posts: 11363 Location: �I�[�X�g�����A Country:
Posted: Tue Jun 17, 2008 10:03 am Post subject:
cori wrote:
How many years older? And I guess you're right about younger guys not having that much experience, but still, you and I have more than 5 years difference in age, so my idea of someone "younger" could be your idea of "older."
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