Love/Relationship/Potential Relationship Advice

cori wrote:

Ew, I just realized that's my younger brother's age. :bleh: So basically, I'll be screwing with one of his classmates if it came true. :ashamed:

Is Hawaii THAT small a place?? :mrgreen:

Anime Dad wrote:

Is Hawaii THAT small a place?? :mrgreen:

Yes, it is, and I'm not even joking. You can't do anything with anyone without people finding out somehow. People are so nosy and gossipy and it's really irritating. :grumble:

cori wrote:

Yes, it is, and I'm not even joking. You can't do anything with anyone without people finding out somehow. People are so nosy and gossipy and it's really irritating. :grumble:

Kawaisou na coco-chan :hug:

cori wrote:

How many years older? And I guess you're right about younger guys not having that much experience, but still, you and I have more than 5 years difference in age, so my idea of someone "younger" could be your idea of "older."

How many years older? Good question. I don't want a guy who'll baby me...

cori wrote:

Ew, I just realized that's my younger brother's age. :bleh: So basically, I'll be screwing with one of his classmates if it came true. :ashamed:

LOL! Hmmm... 30 would be four years older than me. That would be "perfect" in "conventional" situations, wouldn't it?

Anime Dad wrote:Kawaisou na coco-chan :hug:

Yep. Yet another reason why I wish I lived in the mainland or somewhere bigger than this island. :grumble:

cori wrote:

Yep. Yet another reason why I wish I lived in the mainland or somewhere bigger than this island. :grumble:

There's plenty of space in Australia ;)

Anime Dad wrote:There's plenty of space in Australia ;)

Now if only I could find a job where I can author DVDs and watch dramas at. I'd totes move there if I could find one. :mrgreen:

On topic: Oh sorry. I can't be on topic because I gots no relationship, no potential guy, or anything like that, which makes me wonder why the hell I'm posting in or visitning this thread in the first place. :shamefulcry:

cori wrote:

Now if only I could find a job where I can author DVDs and watch dramas at. I'd totes move there if I could find one. :mrgreen:

On topic: Oh sorry. I can't be on topic because I gots no relationship, no potential guy, or anything like that, which makes me wonder why the hell I'm posting in or visitning this thread in the first place. :shamefulcry:

Fortunately the topic broadly permits potential relationship advice as well :)

phlargo wrote:

Fortunately the topic broadly permits potential relationship advice as well :)

I mean, hell, I'm single and have been for two years.. and I'm not even looking, yet still I'm here posting :victory:

^ Yup, and I addressed my question to everyone. You don't have to be a relationship right now to respond.

phlargo wrote:

I mean, hell, I'm single and have been for two years.. and I'm not even looking, yet still I'm here posting :victory:

I've been single longer than that (but had the occasional fling in the process). I'm not looking, but at the same time, I wouldn't mind finding someone, just as long as I don't have to go out of my way to do so. I think I'm going to be single for the rest of my life if I keep this up. :shamefulcry:

Wynter wrote:^ Yup, and I addressed my question to everyone. You don't have to be a relationship right now to respond.

True, but I wanted to get on topic somehow. :hehe:

cori wrote:True, but I wanted to get on topic somehow. :hehe:

There's a first. :P

IMHO: Whatever suits you, but if you are still in high school, virgin or religious, 3 months is ok. If you are older, the guy will probably run away or it will create lots of tension. :sweat:

I wouldn't sleep on the 1st night, if you just met the person. (If you want things to last) There was this unwritten rule, where you need to wait after the 3rd date or something. If you've known the person for a long time, IMHO it's ok to do it 15min after the first kiss. I'd consider the time passed together as nice date time. That happened to me before, and I never considered them sluts. ;)

So, for me, I'd say after a few dates for a stranger. Maybe 3 dates after you know you are a couple (aka make out sessions). :victory:

tabana wrote:IMHO: Whatever suits you, but if you are still in high school, virgin or religious, 3 months is ok. If you are older, the guy will probably run away or it will create lots of tension. :sweat:

I wouldn't sleep on the 1st night, if you just met the person. (If you want things to last) There was this unwritten rule, where you need to wait after the 3rd date or something. If you've known the person for a long time, IMHO it's ok to do it 15min after the first kiss. I'd consider the time passed together as nice date time. That happened to me before, and I never considered them sluts. ;)

So, for me, I'd say after a few dates for a stranger. Maybe 3 dates after you know you are a couple (aka make out sessions). :victory:

I suppose it would really depend on who is viewing this whole perspective of dating. When i was younger, in my early twenties, it was all new, and just getting into a relationship was all new to me. I didn't have any experience of views of what all that entailed. For me, i think sleeping with someone is something more special, and it involves giving yourself to someone, and i might sound hypocritical about this, at one time i had mixed feelings. After several tough experiences on relationships, now that i am just over my mid-thirties, i value the time i can put into get into a relationship and what i hope to get out of one. I made some mistakes to know what i do not wish to invest my time in. I've been out of a relationship for over 3 years and i would never imagine it to be this tough, but i cannot speak for everyone, but for myself, after my last breakup, i think it was good for me to sorta avoid any situation of re-entering another relationship. Entering into another relationship again, is moving forward and entering various social situations that put you in a position to better your chances at meeting people. Of course, there is nothing guaranteed, but even if the next date, doesn't lead to another, i know it can help my dating-confidence. Never did i imagine, it would be like learning to walk, talk again, in re-entering the dating scene after my last relationship of 5 years. I think in my last 3 years of being single, i did learn somethings about myself, and had to overcome some things about singleness. To re-enter a relationship, i know it is all about taking chances, some luck, and some patience and sometimes doing things you might not want to do, for example, for me it was attending a bible study group and being the only new person. It might not sound hard, but for me, despite being an extravert, i had to relearn a lot of things i was used before, while dating, but now as a single. I think i know for myself, i am, and have been ready for awhile to re-enter another relationship.

I guess the key(s) to start a relationship is leave your comfort zone, to be open and to be prepared to compromise a little. :victory:

PS: we don't really do dates over here so you just meet people and take decisions ...

EstherM wrote:PS: we don't really do dates over here so you just meet people and take decisions ...

Wait, what?

EstherM wrote:
PS: we don't really do dates over here so you just meet people and take decisions ...

I don't know why, but I thought of a kaidan sushi concept, where there's a line of people rotating and you choose who you want. :hehe:

cori wrote:

I don't know why, but I thought of a kaidan sushi concept, where there's a line of people rotating and you choose who you want. :hehe:

Mebbe she's talking about omiai (sp?) situations...

cori wrote:I don't know why, but I thought of a kaidan sushi concept, where there's a line of people rotating and you choose who you want. :hehe:

I thought it was "kaiten." :headscratch:

bmwracer wrote:
I thought it was "kaiten." :headscratch:

Oops! :bonk: